


To the star

by snowynight



Category: Chinese Mythology
Genre: Angst, First Time, Multi, Pining, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-14
Updated: 2012-11-14
Packaged: 2017-11-18 15:17:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/562484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snowynight/pseuds/snowynight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Boatman 's assigned the tedious task of bringing Cowherd across the Heavenly River, he doesn't expect that it'll completely change his life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To the star

**Author's Note:**

  * For [lnhammer](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lnhammer/gifts).



> Thanks to my beta C!

It was hatred at first sight.

Boatman could tell from Cowherd's rough tone of speaking and the flame in his eyes that he resented him, a symbol of the bureaucracy that torn him and his wife apart, yet Cowherd still needed to accommodate him. Too bad, Boatman thought, as he resented him too. He could have been anywhere, steering his boat in the wide world, but now he was struck with Cowherd here.

However, Cowherd's children broke the ice between them.

Boatman had seen many things: fish with a human head, birds which sounded like deers, but human children? They were so strange: speaking of things he could hardly understand, doing things undecipherable to him.

 _Better keep away_ , Boatman thought. But he recognized the same loneliness in their eyes when they pulled him over, asking for stories. So he stayed for them, trying to muster up his bare imagination to talk in his rusty, underused voice. Sometimes Cowherd would come to the backyard of the house that Boatman stayed to listen; he kept mostly quiet but sometimes inserted disbelieving snarky comment when Boatman talked about the wider world he experienced.

Things changed gradually between them. Firstly Cowherd invited him to share a warm meal. He accepted; it probably wasn't poisoned. It was not delicious but it was fulling. Then later the night Cowherd said, "Do you have time to stay?"

Boatman still wasn't sure why he agreed.

Cowherd spoke of his life in the mortal realm: The longing for his home, the green fields and the brown hills; the guilt of his cow's sacrifice for him; the grief and anger of the separation with his wife Weaving Woman; his sinking in a strong sense of loneliness.

"I don't know why I tell you this," Cowherd said.

Grief didn't fit the Cowherd, Boatman thought, so he asked awkwardly, "Do you want me to sneak you over to see your wife?"

"It'll land you in trouble. Just... stay here over sometimes. The children like you."

After that, Boatman stayed over more, talking with Cowherd and playing with the children. He began looking forward to it more, and his heart felt lighter when he saw them.

One day, Cowherd told him how his heart leaped like a calf whenever he saw his wife. The Boatman dwelt on the words on his way back. He had an epiphany and was so shocked that he ran as if being chased by ghosts.

He was in love with Cowherd.

_No..._

Weaving Woman was graceful and beautiful, even when tiredness and grief carved lines on her face and cut into her body. She burst into a smile whenever she saw Cowherd and their children. She was good to Boatman: always gentle and polite. He could see why Cowherd was in love with her. He would be in love with her too.

This silly feeling mustn't be what Cowherd named love, but how should he call it?

He debated whether or not to stay away, but he couldn't. He had his duty. Besides, the pain of separation was greater than the pain of his unrequited feelings.

He could now understand Cowherd's pain.

He lived in constant fear that his strange feelings would be exposed, forcing him to lose the friendship he had now. He didn’t want to see disgust in Cowherd’s eyes, though he deserved it for lusting after a married man.

He felt like a moth, drawn to the fire whenever he saw Cowherd, and soon he was trapped in a cocoon that he himself had woven.

He counted Cowherd’s sidelong glances of him, stored every one of the smiles aimed toward him, and weaved fantasies about them. Boatman knew it would only hurt himself further when he broke these dreams with his own hands; he shouldn’t yearn for the impossible because that could stretch for eternity.

It hurt, but Boatman didn’t see a future for himself with Cowherd.

One day, Boatman was invited by Weaving Woman for a walk, and his hands began to sweat. _What if..._ So many possibilities. _Does she discover anything? But I have hidden it so well!_

Weaving Woman smiled at him and said, "Thank you for being here with us. You know you're part of our family, right?"

"Thank you, Madam."

"It's good. I can see the love between you two."

Boatman’s heart skipped a beat. "I'm not sure what you mean..."

"Love is good. Please be there for my husband."

"Madam?"

Weaving Woman smiled, which only made him more scared. "I like you too. We're all lonely."

She didn’t mean what I hear, he thought. I must be perverted enough to interpret her words in a romantic way. "I will try to be a good enough friend for him."

Weaving Woman winked at him. "You're a good enough friend to him, but you want and can be more, do you?"

"Madam, I..."

"It's all right. The Heaven forbided me to marry a mortal, but I never regret it no matter the price. We may as well bend those rules for all of us to be happy."

Boatman was speechless. Weaving Woman's offer was generous beyond his imagination. He need to think about it. Part of him was certain that it was all part of a dream.

"Take your time to think about it. There's no need to hurry."

"What does your husband think of it?"

"He has enough heart for us both."

Boatman was sleepless during the week after. What should he do?

Finally he asked Cowherd, who only said, "You're already our family."

Was it a yes?

When Boatman next took Cowherd across the Heavenly River again, Cowherd spent the whole day with Weaving Woman. At the end of the day Boatman thought that perhaps Weaving Woman was only joking.

Weaving Woman invited him in. She said, “What’s your decision?”

“Madam,...”

“I want you to know that you’re a part of our family whatever you choose, but I’m serious about my words.”

Boatman stuttered, “Madam, I... I would like to, but...”

“Deal!” Weaving Woman said.

Cowherd joined them. Both of them smiled at him.

Boatman found his throat blocked, not having the words to express how he felt.

"We're together now," Weaving Woman said.

By the end of the evening, all three of them were holding hands. Boatman looked at the other two and still didn't know what this all meant to them. It was too big, too scary, too new; anything could go wrong and he could lose everything he had.

But you didn't get a tiger cub if you didn’t dare to enter the tiger cave.  Weaving Woman and Cowherd offered him everything he wanted.  
It would be a new chapter of their lives, and Boatman embraced it carefully.


End file.
